5 Things Your Designated Driver Would Like to Tell the Drunk You

By Auto Parts Warehouse on December 31, 2016

It’s party season once again. And the best way for you and your friends to survive it without leaving your car somewhere and taking a cab home is to pick a designated driver. The DD should commit to stay sober throughout the duration of the party. But having one doesn’t mean you can become so intoxicated and out of control. As much as possible, limit the quantity of alcohol you’ll take in.

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But of course, we forget that limit when we’re already in that party vibe. When that happens, stop pestering your DD. You already got him bummed out by picking him to be the DD, so don’t annoy him more by doing crazy things that could put both of you in some kind of trouble. Besides “Why do I have to be the one to drive?” here are some other things your DD would like to tell you:

1. “I’m dead tired proving the cops that I’m the DD and the only one in the car who’s sober.”

Source: MTV

“You know what? I know you’re drunk but please stop acting crazy while inside the car. That will increase our risk of getting pulled over and will make it more impossible for the cops to believe that I don’t have any alcohol in my system right now. So please don’t become overly intoxicated, so I won’t end up looking like an idiot in front of the cops.”

2. “Stop pestering me to take a sip!”

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“When I agreed to be your DD, I have put this in mind: NOT A SIP! So please stop trying to change the meaning of the words ‘designated driver’ into ‘the least drunk of the bunch’ by pestering me to get a sip of your drink or have just one glass wine. Even ‘a bottle of beer’ is not gonna work on me.”

3. “Friends don’t allow their friends to drink and drive, but please don’t puke on my car’s upholstery.”

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“I know it’s so easy for you to ask for forgiveness after, but it won’t hurt to just tell me when you feel like throwing up so I can pull over and let you spew your guts out in the right place than all over my upholstery and car mats. Otherwise, can I just drive your car?”

4. “I’m just human, I need to catch some Z’s too.”

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“While I totally understand how alcohol raises your adrenaline levels, you also have to know that I can’t stay awake all night and might doze off while driving. So we must stick to the time we have agreed to leave.”

5. “I’m no Uber; don’t volunteer my services to others.”

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“The drunk you sometimes get so generous that you offer not just a drink but also my services to others. The commitment I made to stay sober just so I can drive you home safe is only valid for you and our group of friends. Don’t add my responsibilities by appointing me the DD of another group or person.”

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